I have no words...

Ugh. I'm sitting here in the pediatric wing of Utah Valley Regional Medical Center. Again. But this time, it's for Luke. My dear, lovely sister, gave him RSV. Yep, the #1 leading cause of death in infants. I don't think you can fully grasp at how pissed, that doesn't seem like the right word... FURIOUS! I am with my her! GUH! I mean, seriously! Your kid has been sick with a high temp, cough, and stuffy nose and you and your hubby are feeling crappy and you decide, "Oh lets go to a birthday party!" YOU DON'T DO THAT WITH A NEW BABY IN THE HOUSE!!!!!!!!! It's just common sense to not go over to someone's house when you're sick. Or let people come over cuz of the germs.

So, Luke and Porter were both deathly ill on Monday, so I took them in to see the doc. He said that it was walking pneumonia and gave them antibiotics. I had been in the ER the day before because I was having trouble breathing and I got diagnosed with an upper respiratory infection and was given tylenol with codeine to help the sinus headache, sore throat and ear aches. I googled it and found out that it's the adult form of RSV. So I googled RSV and researched it a bit.

I wasn't concerned because Porter had it when he was like 9 months old and he was alright. All we did was keep a humidifier in the room and then we would turn on the shower to hot and close the door and make it into a steam room for about 30 minutes. And then at night or if it's cold, take them outside because the cold air opens the airways too.

But the kids were on antibiotics for something else, so I didn't think anything of it. Porter got better after a day of taking his azithromicin. Lukey was on amoxiccillan and he wasn't getting any better. I just figured it was cuz he was on a lower dose of meds because of his size. Makes sense. But today was different. I put him in the bathroom for the steam and when we came out, I noticed that his lips were blue and his hands where ghostly pale. I just figured it was due to the sudden change in atmosphere. Again, makes sense. So a couple hours later, I was looking at his hands again to see if they were just white because they were cold, but they weren't cold at all. So I called my trusty "nurse" friend, Kim (not really a nurse, but helps me out with anything kid related) and asked her if it was normal for new babies to have really white hands and I just hadn't noticed it before. She asked me about his lips and I told her they had a slight blue tint, but nothing very bad. Then I said that in the bathroom his lips were blue. She asked me if he was in the tub cuz that can cause blue lips, and I said no, that it was extremely hot and humid in there. The second she heard that, she yelled, "GO TO THE HOSPITAL! GET THE FUCK OFF THE PHONE AND GO! NOW!" Then sweetly said,"Keep me posted" and hung up the phone.

So I loaded him up and off we went to the ER. They checked his oxygen saturation and it was at 87%. Not good. They put him on oxygen while they did some other tests and stuff. He got a chest x-ray to see if the pneumonia had cleared and they listened to him breathing and checked him out physically. You could see that he was straining to breath. Then they sucked out all of his boogers and ran an RSV test. It was possitive. I seriously begged the ER doc to just let us go home since it wasn't a serious case of it. He laughed and said, "no. your son can't breathe. You are getting admitted."

So, here I am, sitting across from my small 2.5 month old baby who is hooked to an oxygen nose tubey thing. Until you have kids, you don't really know the feeling of watching that. There's just no way to describe it. I say everyday that I would gladly be bedridden sick for a couple days than to see my kids sick. Porter stayed in bed for 3 days! He didn't get out once. You know he's sick when he does that. Wow. I've never seen that before. Ever. But seriously, every time that Lukey coughs, my heart breaks a little more. His eyes are all puffy and red from the lack of sleep and from his eyes watering so much. His nose is sore from the nurses sucking all the boogers out and he moans like he can't figure out what is going on with him. It's so sad!

But, the thing that REALLY pissed me off, was when I called Vanessa. I told her that the kids had RSV and that Lukey was in the hospital because of her. I also told her that she got Libby and her 4 year old Cameron, sick and that her 2.5 month old daughter was getting a runny nose. And I said that my mom was starting to get a sore throat (which is how mine started. I prayed it was strep because then they kids couldn't get it.) And you know what she said?! Oh, this really REALLY... she's lucky she's still alive... she says all sweetly, "Love you!" and hung up the phone. She didn't give a shit! She didn't say she was sorry or that she felt bad or that she messed up, that I would have handled cuz it's Vanessa. I expect her to not think. But for her not to CARE?! That just... there are no words... she's lucky I didn't go over to her house and kill her. Libby thinks that Vanessa should pay for all the medical bills because it was their fault that they got all of us sick. I don't want Kevin coming after us tho. Ugh, the fucking bitch didn't care! That just baffles my mind. I just... GUH! Had I known they were sick, I wouldn't have let them come into my house. And the fact that they were all playing with Luke and Porter the whole party and THEN telling me they were all sick as they were leaving. They wouldn't have said anything if I hadn't noticed Thomas being so mellow.

I better stop before I do some serious damage to the computer or something.

Rambling...joy

First off, I want to apologize, again, for not updating sooner. I know this sounds redundant, but seriously I forget to update this one and I don't want to make it seem like I write the same things. I guess this one is a bit more personal. The other one on LiveJournal seems to just be me bitching about stuff. LOL. But I guess some people enjoy reading that... anyways...

Luke is now almost 8 weeks old! How insane is that? He's getting so big! Last time we went to the doc he was over 11 pounds and he was almost 23 inches long. That was maybe 2 or so weeks ago. He's smiling now and "talks". It's so cute!

Porter loves being a big brother. I was really scared to see how he would react with the new baby, but he absolutely loves it. He likes to help out a lot too, which can be a good thing.

Speaking of Porter, he's going to be 3 on Saturday! Wow! Where does the time go? Seriously? We're having a party on Saturday, but it's supposed to rain. :( Let's just pray it doesn't because I can't fit 30+ people in my house. We tried to fit about 20 for his 1st birthday and it was soooo cramped.

My sister in law Julie is having a baby shower next weekend. I'm so excited! She's having a boy in the middle of May. That makes a lot of May birthdays especially since my other sister in law Maria in Texas is having a girl in May too. Actually, Julie and Maria are due the same day. :) So that would make me, Seth, Bub, the 2 babies, Grant (I think) and someone else, that all have birthdays in May. Of course, I've gotten used to having a party for the 3 of us since Seth and Bub's are on the 2nd and mine's the 3rd. It's really funny to sing happy birthday to the 3 of us at the same time and then the 3 of us blowing out the candles. LOL. It's also a HUGE cake and then each of our fave ice creams.